The outbreak of the virus in India broke into my idea of a perfect world. I became really terrified as to what next might come knocking on my doorstep. What’s the next big thing, what am I to do with this new world of social distancing? I don’t even know how to do that perfectly.

I have grown to love my social life of going to different locations and visiting my grandma who is out of town. Now I can’t even travel a few miles away to see my beloved grandmother. I am stuck in one position and this feeling is making me nauseous. It is driving me crazy! I look like trash at the moment, as I haven’t had my hair done in months. I barely know how to even cut my fingernails, how am I supposed to trim my hair the way my hairdresser would have done?

The quarantine policy of wearing a face mask when going out doesn’t seem like a vaccine to me. I am really terrified of going out of my house. I need to go back to being myself, to waking up and taking long walks just to clear my head, to getting coffee and sipping it like the world is at peace.

I miss my independence already, I honestly miss being free. Screaming my lungs out wouldn’t take the fear in me out. I have seen and rewatched countless movies. I am bored beyond measure. There’s isn’t a thing I haven’t done, and I am trying to not gain weight from sitting and laying down 24/7, the only way I know to lose weight is to exercise. I started that yet, I feel like I am not doing a thing. I don’t want to come out of self-isolation looking like I’ve gained a lot of weight, although that isn’t avoidable.