This virus has taken SO MUCH from me. I lost all of my friends because of all the new rules to try to stop the spread. My senior recital has been postponed until heaven knows when, and I don’t get a commencement ceremony until next May. I was not even on the campus of my university when they announced that there were going to be big changes due to this virus. I was on a tour with my choir in different places in Kansas. I cried for hours after hearing about these. It broke my heart so much to think that my last semester at my wonderful school was stolen from me.
The original plan was just to have an extra week of spring break plus ONE week of online learning. A couple of days into the original spring break, the president officially shut down the campus, so I tried so very hard to find a place to stay for a little while. I called the mental crisis hotline multiple times. The next day, the school officially announced that the semester will be finished online. Zoom classes were NOT the same as in-person classes. I miss everyone so very badly, and I am feeling super hopeless about everything now. I absolutely love hugs, and I cannot get them due to social distancing. I do not enjoy being 6 feet away from people that I love. It’s just not fair.
I have been in college for 8 years of my life, and I was dreaming of all the really special events that I was going to be able to get. Now, it feels like absolutely nothing will ever feel normal again. I know that I can at least talk to people over the phone and via Zoom (when it is not crashing on me). But I so badly want to be with everyone in the same room again. I am so glad that I still get lessons, but I would rather be in the same room as them. This virus has taken a tremendous amount of things from me, and I may never stop mourning things!!!
I am so sorry for what you have been through. Are you feeling better now? Can you get a vaccine- I know that younger age groups are able to get them now- look at the ‘conditions’ to get them. I believe mental health is one of them. I pray you have found peace amongst this pandemic. Maybe a little vacation – do not be afraid of not ‘going alone with the crowd’. I am much older than you and I see many that I went to school with – who followed the crowd- and there whole lives seem to be like that. I have a feeling you are a leader not follower.
God bless you. hugs, Linda H